[God sits at the high end of an office meeting room desk, as his employees file in nervously.]
God – Sit down, sit down everybody.

[They all sit, and get out their pads, pens, dictaphones, etc.]

God – Apologies for absence? No? Good. First item on the agenda: meat. Dave, if we could have a status report please.

[Dave stands, and walks to the screen at the end of the room. He starts a bit shaky.]

Dave – Well, sir, we came up with this.

[A cow outline is projected on the screen behind him.]

God – Ooh, very good. Very good. [claps]

[Everybody takes their cue from God and claps - looking a little relieved.]

God – Talk us through it then.

Dave – Well, these are… um… the legs.

God – Obviously.

Dave – Obviously, yes. And well, then the eyes go here.

God – Quite right, quite right. On the front. Don’t want it running into any turbulence. Are you all taking notes?

Dave – And then, er… the meat goes here.

God – Mmm… good. Lots of room for meat. Everybody agree?

[Lots of nodding.]

Dave – And that’s about it really.

[Dave looks very relieved. A smattering of polite applause.]

God – Ok, ok. Nothing else?

Dave – Well, not really, no sir.

God – No wings?

[Dave shakes his head.]

God – Well. I have to admit I like it. It’s simple. It’s elegant. But what’s it missing? Anyone?

[Everybody looks down at their pads.]

God – Boobies!

Dave – I beg your pardon, sir?

God – Yes. Yes! It’s got to have boobies. And… and… milk! Milk you can squeeze out of the boobies.

Dave – Are, you… are you sure, sir?

God – Oh yes. A bit of meat. A bit of milk. We’re talking ready meals here! Come on, everybody – get to work on it! We’ll be selling these in supermarkets across the world in no time. I want your boobies on my desk by midday!